Saturday, April 17, 2010

Curly fucking fries!


My future wife.

Imagine that the leprechaun living under my sink decided to jump on your head for 25 minutes. The Kristen Bell comes, pushes the fucker away and starts blowing you. But less than a minute later, the leprechaun pushes her off and starts jumping on your face. Kristen gets up and throws him off you and starts blowing you again, but he comes back, then she comes back.. for a good stretch of time, but the leprechaun wakes up again, throws her off, bites her and starts jumping on you. A few minute later she is back, throws him into the cupboard and finishes the job. Now that I think of it, Kristen Bell is mine, so fuck off (that includes you, weird guy from Punk'd that she is "engaged" to), imagine Mila Kunis instead. And the get your own god damn leprechaun. But anyway, that's how this game felt.


She just doesn't know it yet

Recap
The first period was weird and had a fucking ton of stoppages. The Wings got on their heels early, but got a PP out of it. It was cheap, but got negated by an even cheaper penalty on Bert after a dive by Jovanovski. On their PP the Coyotes had a huge chance, but Cleary saved it. The Wings were the best team for the next minutes, but the Yotes had their chances too. Then an innocent play ended with Flip missing his man Yandle, who scored. That energized the Coyotes and even though the Wings had some good chances, the Dogs dominated the rest of the period. They were faster, harder and wanted it more. The Wings were all wrong. Towards the end the Yotes got another dirt cheap PP, didn't score on the part that was in the first.

The second period started with the second half of the Phoenix PP. The Wings killed it, but didn't look too good at the start of the period. Then a little before the midway mark they got a PP. It looked horrible, but suddently something happened, to start the weirdest, sloppiest 3:58 I have ever seen of a hockey game. Kronwall lost the puck, but it found Z, who found Fil, who got it back and Z scored. Great rush. Right after that Jimmah and Kronner miscommunicated, Kronner got a stick on it, but it ended with Wolski who scored. But the Wings answered with a beautiful feed from Mule to Pasha who scored on a one times. But right after that Rafa pinched, failed and a nice Doan pass ended with Lombardi, who beat Miller, got a breakaway and scored. But the Wings came back when Bertuzzi delivered the puck to Fil right before getting smoked. Fil won the footrace, got the breakaway and scored. All that in 3:58. Then the Wings had a flurry of chances when they were first to the puck, passed faster than the Dogs could hit and shot at every opportunity. They were the best team for the rest of the period, but also gave the Coyotes som way too big chances.

The third started with more Wings pressure, and it paid off. After a little more than two minutes Abby stole a puck, Datysuk style, got a breakaway and scored. Gary's refs answered by promptly putting the Dogs on the PP, but it didn't work. Instead the Wings started dominating and creating some wild chances, but the Yotes got some counter-attacks and when Rafa missed on a pinch, they got a two-on-Lids and Fuckface Doan scored. Second time they scored after Rafa was caught pinching. They promptly got another PP, but it was killed and intead Bert threw a puck at Bryzgalov, and Z shot the rebound home for 5-4. With 4 mins left Doan, for the second time of the night, decided to give the refs no choice but to penalize him and on the PP Bert screened Bryzgalov while Fil scored. And Z got his hat trick in the empty net. Glory! Series tied.

Thoughts
- FS Hamilton/Winnipeg feed and fucking Dave Strader and Tyson Nash are horrible. At times they are wrong about what happens, they are cocky and homerific as fuck and everytime Doan hits someone waaay after the play or dirtily in another way they jizz their pants.
- The refs were gruesome. They missed high sticks, crosschecks to the head, holdings and all kinds of stuff.

3 things that worked
- Woke up in the second.
- Dominant third
- Great PK

3 things that didn't
- The Wings came out flat.
- They still were too sloppy defensively in the second.
- Used too long to put them away

Play of the game
The Pasha goal, what a pass by Franzén, what a finish by Pavel.

Player of the game
Henrik "Curly Fries" Zetterberg

2 comments:

  1. What did I learn tonight?

    That I can look at that second picture of Kristen Bell forever without getting tired.

    ReplyDelete