Welcome to 25:19, a feature that will run every Monday for 19 (duh!) weeks. Every week I will make 5 (Nick) lists, with 5 (number of rings Nick will retire with) points on each list. Thus having 25 (DMac) points in total every week. The lists will be random hockey stuff, some rankings, other in random order. Some will be opinions, others humour. I will leave it to you judge what is what. Hopefully you will find it entertaining and/or provoking enough to leave your ideas on things I missed and what I did wrong in the comments.
1. Five signs that you're obsessed with hockey
- You remember numbers through jersey numbers and when you hear different numbers, all you can think of are different players.
- You think How I Met Your Mother's Canadian sex metaphor system of blue line, red line and in the crease is much cooler than the baseball metaphors in today's America.
- You can give a decent analysis of Jassen Culimore's career.
- You can name at least one team Mike Sillinger did NOT play for.
- You know you're gonna tune in to the first available pre-season game, even though it's gonna be between two teams you don't care about and they ice 5 regular NHL players in total.
2. Five favourite Rosby moments
- Cindy goes after Z and gets owned by Jimmah.
- Kirk Maltby murders Rosby with a slash... that barely touches him.
- Cindy gets so frustrated with Z, he tries to end his career
- Brad Stuart lets Cindy get to see white lights
- Rosby punches Valabik in the ass.
3. Five reasons the Wings will win the cup this year
- We have a goalie, that is he avoids the slump, can carry a team on his back for stretches of time AND a backup that has won 3 cups and backstopped his team to two more finals.
- We have the world's best defenseman ever and a solid defense corps around him.
- We have four lines where, if they click, the 1st line is the best 1st line in the league, the 2nd line is the best 2nd line and so on.
- We have a coach that has been the best and winningest coach in the league the past decade.
- We are Hockeytown. We always win.
4. Five things I miss about Fox Sports Detroit
- Ken Daniels. I don't know, but the guy is just, safe and warm and hockey for me.
- Mickeyisms. Like bingo bango, or ranting about broken sticks.
- The moment in each broadcast when you realize Murph is truly wasted.
- Murph's rants, like the one about the Canucks logo.
- John Keating. He always messes something up, like "Sidney the kidney". Brilliant.
5. Five players I hate more than I hate Ohio
- Claude the Turtle. I hate that fucker more than I hate the Blackhawks for fuck's sake.
- Cindy Rosby. Class never come at a lower level in a better and more overhyped player.
- Sasquatch. Just look at his ugly mug.
- Patrick Roy. Puke.
- Captain Greybeard Niedermayer. You don't try to kill Pavel Datsyuk without me hating you.
From Norway, Triana Iglesias. You can all thank me later.
I feel that the quote on the picture deserves translation: "It is hard to take Swedish policemen seriously. There's something about the hats they wear.
For the ladies, I don't get either of these two, but I know there are girls who think each are hot, so here it comes, and it would be a shame to not get Meech done before he leaves the team.
3 years ago